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Too Much Turf In The Surf

Hey folks, Kidfresh here again. This time, I’m not back from a culinary suicide mission like last time.  This time, I went to eat at a real restaurant called Stone Park Cafe.


It’s located in one of the more economically privileged areas in Brooklyn. As it is with these trendy little spots, it sometimes looks like they made moderate renovations to someones living room. And depending on what part of the city it’s located, it could look like the living room of a boxcar hobo.

This place was a bit more sedate and a bit more mundane to be frank.


But it was not a problem for my friend Simone and I to have brunch.

Now, as a person who has a sweet tooth, and has always loved sweet drinks, I never thought I would think to myself  ‘my beverage needs more hot sauce’. But in fact, that was the case with my Bloody Mary.

bloody mary

Full disclosure, this is not my actual drink in the photo above. I forgot to take a snap shot of it, so I utilized the handy-dandy services of Google Image. It looks pretty damn close to what I had though, I must say. And perhaps the reason I forgot to take the picture was because I couldn’t believe that I was putting hot sauce in my drink. This was only the second Bloody Mary I’d had in my life. The first and more tasty experience of this drink actually came on an Amtrak train heading from Seattle to Vancouver last year (shout out to my cute Canadian foodie hostess). That one was savory and delicious. I found that the flavor of this one was a bit washed out by the large amount of vodka.

Although, you should never complain about TOO MUCH booze in your drink.

My Bloody Mary was the adventurous portion of my meal….. at least for me, anyway. Explanation forthcoming. I went standard and ordered scrambled eggs, home fries, a home-made english muffin, and andouille sausage.

Kidfresh's meal

The sausage was bangin’ (that was for my British brothers and sisters) Very spicy, particularly for a non-ethnic restaurant.  They tend to keep things bland…. like my eggs,  home fries and english muffin. They even served me salt free butter! WHAT THE HELL!?!?!?!

But I digress. Simone and I shared this delicious sour dough french toast.


The light sourdough flavor combined with the Black Bear maple syrup and/or berry compote was the most satisfying dish we’d had that day. The center of each slice was just a tad soggy, but miniscule in comparison to the satisfaction of the flavor.

Sigh…………………… and now we come to Simone’s meal.

This, my friends, is what they call a Hangtown Fry, which consists of a tempura fried, oyster fritatta, bacon, and Cabbot cheddar.  MMMMMM  sounds lovely, doesn’t it? Now, I have never been a huge fan of seafood. I don’t hate it, but for the life of me, I just don’t get why panties get soaked and guys blow their load in their Fruit Of The Looms when lobster, crab or oysters are on the table. And maybe the following sentences help explain why I think this way.

Simone's Meal

On the second oyster in Simone’s oyster frittata, she bit down on some oyster shell. It took her a minute to separate the piece of shell from the rest of the half chewed oyster in her mouth, but she persevered. As a seafood lover, she dealt with it, and carried on. On her third or fourth oyster,  she said she had sand in her mouth. Again, as a person who does not order much seafood, I don’t know how “normal” an incident like this is. I imagine that any establishment would not like something like this to happen, regardless of it’s perceived normalcy.

This, however, is still better than my last experience with a friend and an oyster order. Many years ago I had lunch with another seafood loving friend of mine. She too ordered oysters, but hers were on the half shell. Shortly after we began eating, I heard her wincing and breathing heavy. I looked up and saw that she was in clearly in distress.  I asked her what was wrong and all she could do was point. When I looked at her plate, a tiny baby crab was walking out of its comfy home in half shell and onto her plate. It looked pretty close to this, but a bit more translucent if I remember correctly. (Thanks again, Google Images)


In short, she freaked out, ran to the bathroom and vomited. I was thoroughly amused and couldn’t stop laughing. And, I graciously accepted the waitresses offer of not paying for our meal, which included my VERY DEAD cow steak.

So, if you’re ever in Brooklyn I would suggest you try Stone Park Cafe. Overall, the food was good and they have other interesting things on their menu. But if you choose the oysters, and a great white shark just happens to jump out from under them and bites your lips and right cheek off, don’t say you weren’t warned.

Stone Park Cafe on Urbanspoon

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